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What am I doing starting a blog?

I cannot believe that I am starting yet another thing....but it's about 3:30 am and it seems like what I oughta do....even tho' I'm dreadfully behind on my new (real) website, plus I have a MySpace account....and I've got to edit the family letter....and do the bills and come up with a budget.....on top of writing 2 business plans....

I'm forever biting off more than I can chew, but as I get older and have more life to look back on, I realize that it's not the worst fault to have. If I wasn't always biting off more than I can chew, sure I'd probably be more reliable, but I wouldn't get as much done, nor would I try to do the "Impossible". One of my favorite things about myself is that I never know how hard something's gonna be until I'm already committed to it, so I do things that are "impossible". I wish more people would take a risk now and again.... Not the bungee-jumping kind of risk, but the getting out of one's comfy old rut kind of risk (tho' if bungee-jumping does that for you, please go on wit you baad self).

Everyone laughs at me for talking about how old I'm getting - maybe 'coz most all of my good friends are older than me - but the last eighteen months have been rather a shock to my sensibilities and self-concept. For instance, this sleeplessness I've been having.... yes, it's probably "The Dance of the Waning hormones" or "Estrogen's Last Stand" but I need to rest or I don't get much done during the day. I have a bunch of meditation CDs that help, but nothing works all the time (whinge, whinge). And that's just the tip of the iceberg... I'm kind of fascinated and repelled all at the same time by what's happening to *everything*. I was always hoping that I'd age "gracefully" but I guess the key to that is learning how to do something - anything- gracefully, and I've yet to manage that feat.

Plus, I notice so many of my friends that are musicians all moving on and doing rather wonderful things. Ok, Ok, I *know* that motherhood is the best thing fer me to do right now, I love my children and most of my musician friends don't have the same responsibilities that I do since they are mostly a)men and they have wives/girlfriends who do that childcare thing, b) older and their kids are grown, c) do not have any children, or d) are not Baha'is so they have fewer committees and such to serve on. My husband, thank the Lord, continues to remind me of these facts, but still it's difficult to run into to people who would actually like to hear me sing at local gig someplace and I can't give them any idea when that might happen; one begins to feel as if one couldn't get arrested in this town.

Still, it can always be worse - I could get a regular local gig someplace where there's lots of smoke and people constantly request songs like "Sweet Home Alabama", "Me and Bobby McGee", "Free Bird" or even "Muskrat Love". I could be in a band with people I don't really enjoy, singing covers for the drunk and disorderly folks lurching around the dance floor. I could be ....well, anyway, it could definitely be worse.

Anybody wanna start a band?

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
megknits
Jan. 22nd, 2006 04:54 am (UTC)
Hey you! I'm glad you let me know you've joined LJ. About the sleeplesness -- I went through a phase like that when I was in my mid-30's. Lasted a couple of years. I'd go to sleep just fine at the regular time, then wake up at 3:00 and that was it for the night. Then one day it just stopped, and I started sleeping through the night again, not quite like a baby, but better than before. I think what you're going through isn't quite the ebb and flow of hormones. I'm doing that dance right now, and it's different. Way different.
bjbass
Jan. 26th, 2006 10:14 pm (UTC)
What kind of a band?
helenkosings
Jan. 31st, 2006 07:14 am (UTC)
well, perhaps a "jump blues" band....

Now what kind of band would *you* like to be in but aren't currently involved in; I realize that criteria narrows down the choices severely!
bjbass
Jan. 31st, 2006 09:23 pm (UTC)
What I need is an eight-evening week, but I'd enjoy playing in a blues band. And the other night Larry the drummer said "gee, it'd be fun to play some blues." Are you serious? Did you have anybody in mind? I've got a P-bass with flatwounds, an Ampeg tube amp, and a dual JLB 15" cab, and that gear is just crying to do some blues gigs.
helenkosings
Feb. 1st, 2006 04:02 pm (UTC)
Actually, now that you mention it,I am serious. I hadn't really thought of it before - I guess I assumed you wouldn't want to be in a band with me for some reason...... :o)

But now that I think of it, it could be really really fun - especially if we had the right lead instrumentalist. I'll never be anything other than a barely competent rhythm guitarist, but if we could find a guitar player everyone could stand (!) or even better a piano player (definitely my preference, but they are rare). I'd even be open to a lead horn player (I'd be on rythm guitar or -aack!- comping on keys....). There is one guitar player I'd love to play with, but he works long long hours at the Post Office and so isn't really available for a band. He and I tried to do something together before. Then there's always Jim Cavender - one of my favorite local players, but he stays really busy. Got any suggestions yerself?
bjbass
Feb. 1st, 2006 04:41 pm (UTC)
Not offhand. But I'll think about it. There's one guy who is a possibility, a guy named Jimmie who has been playing at Rick's church. He's a really excellent player who used to make a living at it in the local club scene (Mercey band? before my time here) but gave it up because he got tired of the bar scene. He's got a Les Paul with the white trim turned yellow from years of cigaret smoke. But -- I'm not sure he's up for anything but playing in church.

There are a couple other possibilities.

Cavender would be terrific, but he's way too busy.

You're our blues expert -- why, I hear you even know the famous Helen K! Why don't you put together some mp3s of songs you'd like to do, just 5 or 10 to get things started, if things get started.

helenkosings
Feb. 1st, 2006 04:59 pm (UTC)
Yeah, the bar scene doesn't appeal to me either - of course there's alternatives to that, but that might require some actual work - which I may or may not be up for.....

I'd be interested in hearing Jimmie play sometime. I'm not actually looking to make a lot of cash (lucky thing I'm a musician, huh?) but I would love to sing/play regularly with some folks and have a good time - even if it was just to mess around or do house parties or something. OHF has kinda sucked all the ambition right out of me. :o)

I can definitely get some stuff together - I have a cassette of stuff I put together a while ago, and I think I have a lot of that stuff digitally as well. I'll definitely put that up near the top of the to do list. The great things about blues is that one can survive w/o charts - tho' I'm certainly not above creating/using them. :o)

What about Suzie Nolan? Does she like to play blues piano? I gotta say that I really love to sing with piano over and above guitar any day....

I also have to say that the idea of playing some blues is putting a big smile on my face.
helenkosings
Feb. 1st, 2006 05:00 pm (UTC)
By the way, I *do* know Helen K and she's looks nothing like her voice! Too bad really.... :o)
bjbass
Feb. 1st, 2006 07:12 pm (UTC)
I don't have any desire to play regularly in bars, but I wouldn't rule out an occasional gig at the Kaffeklatch or upstairs at the Jazz Factory, for experience and exposure.

Susie mostly plays piano to comp over her own singing. I don't think she's interested in blues, although she might be, but she's not a soloist at any rate.
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )

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